tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post6831696945468509452..comments2023-07-06T06:04:07.849-07:00Comments on Sister, Daughter, Mother, Wife: To the Teenage Girl Who Says She Doesn't Ever Want to Have ChildrenAnna Mussmannhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-23470115996970394162017-10-24T12:12:58.621-07:002017-10-24T12:12:58.621-07:00I'm so glad you found them encouraging!I'm so glad you found them encouraging!Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-38358999533372774072017-10-24T11:31:22.577-07:002017-10-24T11:31:22.577-07:00Thank you for writing this article. As a new mom, ...Thank you for writing this article. As a new mom, and having recently quit my job of seven years, I think I was not fully prepared for the drastic change of what day-to-day life would actually be like. I have often struggled with feelings of "things are impossible" or "life used to be so much easier." I am gradually learning to better manage my time and day while caring for an infant, and to actually enjoy life and my baby, but your words were good for me to hear.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-3065385936603244892016-03-14T17:35:24.156-07:002016-03-14T17:35:24.156-07:00Hi Karyn,
Thanks for commenting and sharing your ...Hi Karyn,<br /><br />Thanks for commenting and sharing your experience. Just to clarify, I am not not attempting to say (and do not believe) that a woman is "lesser" if she does not have children. Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-56843393709115510832016-03-13T21:42:37.243-07:002016-03-13T21:42:37.243-07:00I was the teenage girl who was positive that I did...I was the teenage girl who was positive that I did not want children. I am now almost 40 and I am positive that I have never wanted children ... and I was raised in a stable, loving home. In fact, next month my parents celebrate their 50th anniversary! Not only have I never felt like I have missed out on anything, I am constantly reassured that my life and my status as a woman (and not a mother) is exactly how it should be. For me. Not for you, and not perhaps for many. But for me. Do you know what is the most common thing I hear when someone asks me if I have kids and I say "no"? They almost always ask, "Why?". But you know what? I've never once heard someone be asked, "Why?" when they just said they have two kids. The mothers and fathers I know who are committed to raising their children in the admonition of the Lord are some of the people I respect the most. But just as Paul would say that there are many members in one body and that not all have the same function, I believe each of us have different gifts, different callings, and different ministries. Should I tell a sister that she's missing out if she is not pursuing the calling to which I am called? May it never be! Nor should she convince me that my life is unfulfilled if I do not pursue her calling. "So we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and and individually members one of another. Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly..." (Romans 12)✿ Karynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14446727375431065021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-52073609259571725992016-02-27T07:17:11.889-08:002016-02-27T07:17:11.889-08:00Parental teamwork is awesome. I remember being on ...Parental teamwork is awesome. I remember being on the receiving end of it, and even then, it's incredibly reassuring. Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-24761549831118164902016-02-25T17:15:33.822-08:002016-02-25T17:15:33.822-08:00Anna, I should have explained that she didn't ...Anna, I should have explained that she didn't actually get away with it. Her father, my husband, took her to task about being disrespectful to her mother. He always has expected the children to be respectful of me and I expect them to be respectful of him. I didn't punish her because I knew (and she came to know) that Dad would! Usually I would say to her, "That's okay, I still love you."Rozy Lasshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06019413665136390175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-73178706710641913832016-02-25T13:18:31.795-08:002016-02-25T13:18:31.795-08:00I guess the big picture is that there will be conf...I guess the big picture is that there will be conflict between parents and kids (and parents will have to make their kids unhappy, sometimes) but that, as you say, dealing with that conflict is part of a mother's job.Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-34968397102880102172016-02-25T11:05:05.436-08:002016-02-25T11:05:05.436-08:00It does! Seeing other parents weather challenges (...It does! Seeing other parents weather challenges (and seeing the results) is huge. <br /><br />In some families, kids do say "I hate you," and the parents handle it well, and it all works out. That's fine. <br /><br />Yet I do like to point out that we don't have to accept adolescent insults as inevitable. I would never have dreamed of saying those words to my mother (nor would any of my siblings). My mom wasn't scary or oppressive--yelling insults just wasn't how things were done in our home.Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-6948933036615260302016-02-25T10:53:34.955-08:002016-02-25T10:53:34.955-08:00Judging from my observations of older moms, I thin...Judging from my observations of older moms, I think it can, because it is GOOD. That doesn't mean it's always easy. There is no shame in struggling or in suffering--sometimes life is hard. Yet in some circles, at least, there seems to be a culture of focusing only on the challenges of motherhood, as if enjoyment of one's children is unobtainable. I pray that I'll enjoy these marvelous, adorable munchkins of mine all the way through their upbringing!<br />Anna Mussmannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11631139113615066986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-23181795017822601292016-02-24T19:12:11.410-08:002016-02-24T19:12:11.410-08:00Our daughter went through a phase during her teens...Our daughter went through a phase during her teens where she would yell "I hate you!" at me. I shrugged it off and replied, "I'm just doing my job." By the time she was no longer a teen she apologized for her past outbursts and told me how grateful she was that I was her mother. I was grateful for older siblings who walked the parental trail before me, and helped me understand what's fairly normal in raising children. It helps to see successful parents go through the "ugly" stages and emerge intact.Rozy Lasshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06019413665136390175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9196316261585940971.post-89309504617737957582016-02-23T05:47:54.300-08:002016-02-23T05:47:54.300-08:00Thank you for writing this. As a new mom myself, ...Thank you for writing this. As a new mom myself, it is easy to be discouraged by the moms I observe who seem to be depressed in their vocations. As much as I love every minute of mommyhood now, I keep wondering if this is the inevitable direction my new job will take. It's always good to be reminded that parenthood can be and remain enjoyable when we live in grace. Thank you!!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06700559751411530306noreply@blogger.com